July 21, 2011 / 10:20AM 10 notes

Kate’s Crew, by Jane Rylon

 

Remember this book? The m/m/m/m/f? Well, Melinda and I were talking about it over Gchat.

Me: OMG THERE’S A PREQUEL WITH FIVE DUDES
Melinda: i actually knew there was a prequel
you should review it. mostly so i don’t write yet another “I read some really horrible trash AGAIN” review
Me: fine, I’ll take this one for the team
Melinda: that’s what she said
in the book
HA
Me: five times
HEYO
Melinda: high five
Me: THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID

We think we’re hilarious. Anyways, I figured it had been a while since we’d explored the depths of cheap Amazon erotica, so I paid the $2 and downloaded Kate’s Crew.

The “plot” is that Kate sees a band of sexy construction workers next door. She falls out of a window ogling them, which leads to her having sex with the leader, which leads to her having sex with all of them. At once.

I was in over my head, let me just admit that right away. When it comes to m/m/m/m/m/f, I am not the target audience. I spend most of the time trying to count penises and to chart out where they were, which ones belonged to which guy (“Oh is this the muscley sensitive guy or the other muscley sensitive guy?”) and where missing ones COULD go should they arrive on the scene (and believe me, Ms. Rylon is not one to leave one dick out of the action just because we’ve run out of holes).

And if you were wondering, yes, this is a series. The same construction crew that plows Kate also nails Morgan and drills Kayla. To my great amusement, it’s sort of the Ten Little Indians of group sex because of course in each story one of the dudes manages to gaze deeply into the eyes of the heroine (past the penises in her mouth and either hand) and fall madly in love and so five horny crew members becomes four, then three, and then there was just the gay couple (there is a gay couple). And yeah, everybody is getting a part of the action here, so you better be ready for m/m, m/m/m, m/f, or any other combination thereof.

There was a baffling moment or two in which I couldn’t figure out where everybody was positioned and I thought we were in a human centipede of anal sex, but that could have just been a misread.

In the midst of all the action, there was a line that gave me pause (I know, I know, “Just one?”) in which Mike explains to Kate why he is NOT bisexual:


I’ve tried everything just about once, but it’s not really my thing. I’ll admit, though … I’ve accepted more than one blow job from the crew members … I’m a guy, I like getting head. For me, if it’s just about having a good time, then a mouth’s a mouth.

I … I am not sure that it works quite that way, but whatever floats your boat. Or monkeys your wrench, as the case may be.

At the end of the day, this is just not my thing, and so I’m hesitant to place any kind of a value judgment on it. If you’re intrigued by the idea of a bunch of men that work on a construction crew and drive around in a van solving mysteries look for women to bang together, then by all means, leapfrog over the Kinsey scale and dive right in. Just make sure you bring the lube.  

m/m/m/m/m/m/m/m/fjane rylonyou get what you pay fordepths of AmazonMelindseroticareviewbooks

Notes

  1. sourdoughislife said: The phrase “a human centipede of anal sex” effectively killed any interest I might have had in reading this. Well done! :D
  2. prehyped reblogged this from romanceclub and added:
    Seriously, we’re so funny. But the overall review is funnier. HIGH FIVE INDEED
  3. romanceclub posted this
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